Sex Jokes
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: 2 GOOD 2 BE TRUE |
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They say sugar is sweet N
honey is 2, but baby wat do I call U? U R sexier than sexy N hotter than
that 2! therez only 1 name 4 U and it is '2 good 2 be true'! |
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: SEX |
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SEX is My Fav. I Do it
regularly. Do it & Feel Gd! U'll enjoy it! I'll Die w/out SEX,
S-Sleep, E-Eat, X-xercise, So do it everiday, gd for u. |
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: SEX ON TEXT |
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Press down... down more... Ok
more... YES ahh ohh yes... almost there... yeah oh shit harder... SO
GOOD...! mmmmm... That's how I sex on text! |
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: YOU ARE WANTED |
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The Police are looking for a
suspect who is smart, sexy, witty & very good looking... So where are
you gonna hide Me? |
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: TALKING DIRTY |
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When a man talks dirty to a
woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's
$3.95 per minute. |
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: LOVE AND SEX |
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Love is a name, Sex is a game.
Forget the name and play the game! |
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: SEX IS ... |
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Sex is a sensation caused by
temptation when a man puts his location in a woman's destination. Do u get
my explanation, or do u need a demonstration?!
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: GIVE ME ALL YOUR $$$ |
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MONEY: can buy a house, but
not a HOME. can buy a clock, but not TIME. can buy sex, but not LOVE. So
pass me all ur $ n let me suffer 4 U |
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: NIGHT PRAYER |
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Dear God, thank you for making
me healthy. Can you also make me sexy? If you can't make me sexy, please
make all my friends fat. Amen. |
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: WHAT I NEED |
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I need a hug, I need touch, I
need tender, I need a kiss, I need love, I need sex, I need you! |
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: WRONG NUMBER |
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U've got SEX APPEAL ... U've
got INTELLIGENCE ... U've got CLASS ... U got da FACE, U got da BODY ... I
got the wrong number ... SORRY |
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: NO SEX ! |
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There is Hot-sex, Fast-sex,
Group-sex, Safe-sex, Leather-sex, Telephone-sex, and for people with your
face ...NO SEX ! |
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: SPEED LIMIT OF SEX |
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What's the speed limit of sex?
Sixty-eight! At 69 you have to turn around... |
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: PHONE ENGAGE |
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hey! what happen 2 your hp?
tried calling alot of times. everytime i dial your no, operator kept sayin
'THE SUBSCRIBER U CALLING IS HAVING SEX, PLS TRY LATER' |
| KFC | A woman is like a kentuckey fried chicken, it has legs ,breasts and a greasy box to stick your bone in. | ||||||||||||||
| Little Star | Twinkle, twinkle little rectum big cocks cum when you least expect them, never mind the screams of passion whoop it up with doggy fashion. | ||||||||||||||
| Arse Icons |
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| Hot Sex | There is Hot-sex, Fast-sex, Group-sex, Safe-sex, Leather-sex, Telephone-sex, and for people with your face ... NO SEX ! | ||||||||||||||
| Womens Needs | There are 4 animal species a woman needs in her life: Jaguar in her
garage, mink in her closet, tiger in her bed! And of course a donkey to pay her bills!! | ||||||||||||||
| Sick Leave | A guy call into work and says: Boss I can´t come to work to day, I´m
sick. Boss asks: How sick are you? The guy says: I´m fucking my sister how sick is that? | ||||||||||||||
| Brand Sex | Sex is like nokia -connecting people like Nike -just do it Like Pepsi -ask for more Like Samsung -everyone is invated and like me -TO GOOD TO BE TRUE! | ||||||||||||||
| Valantine | Roses are red, violets are blue, I was born beautiful, but what the hell happend to you? | ||||||||||||||
| Fucking Mafia | Licking pussy is like playing with the mafia... One wrong move and you are in DEEP SHIT!!!! | ||||||||||||||
| The Bush | When an apple is green it's ready to pluck When a girl is sixteen she's ready to fuck! | ||||||||||||||
| The Alphabet | a-ur attractive b-ur beautiful c-ur caring d-ur delicous e-ur exciting f-ur funny g-ur gorgeous h-ur heavenly I-IM J-JUST K-KIDDING L-LOSER! | ||||||||||||||
| Luv is a sensation | Luv is a sensation dat is caused by temptation,a boy puts his location in a girls destination,do u get my explanation or do u wanna demonstration? | ||||||||||||||
| Good Sex | Sex is good, sex is fine, doggy style or 69, just for fun or getting paid, everyone likes getting laid! | ||||||||||||||
| Equation | Do you like maths, if so add a bed, subtract ur clothes, divide your legs and we can multiply! | ||||||||||||||
| Sex Guide | Bak 2 bak, front 2 front, on d table,lick d cunt, stick it in, do ur ting, do it hard & make her sing, tense ur body feel d cum, den let it rip into her bum! | ||||||||||||||
| Luv me tender | Luv me tender, luv me sweet, rap ur lips around my meat, watch & smile, watch me grin, watch the cum drip down my chin! | ||||||||||||||
| Life as a penis | 5 reasons not 2 b a penis 1)ur bald ur entire life 2)both ur naybors r nutz 3)an arsehole lives b’hind u 4)ur bestm8s a cunt 5)wen xcited u throw up den faint! | ||||||||||||||
| Pregnant | Sex is real evil,sex is a sin,moaning and groaning as he slides slowly in,it cant last 4eva,I no it’s a shame,dat 1 night of passion leads to 9months of pain! | ||||||||||||||
| Flying Fuck | Ill fuck you standing,I fuck you lying,If I had wings Id fuck you flying,if you were dead,your not forgotten,ill dig you up and fuck you rotten! | ||||||||||||||
| Beat Me | Beat me eat me bite my bum, whip me strip me make me cum, suck me fuck me and lick me out,then tickle my nipples until I shout! | ||||||||||||||
| £50 note | 3 advantages of gettin a £50 note tattood on ur
cock: 1- U can play wiv ur money, 2- U can see ur money grow 3- Ur girl can blow as much money as she wants | ||||||||||||||
| Bastard Rubber | D boys say i luv u,U beleve its true,9months l8r he says to hell wiv u,D baby is a bastard,D mother is a whore,Nun of dis wood av happened if d rubber hadnt tore! | ||||||||||||||
| Nice Arse | I like your style, I like your class, but most of all i like your arse! | ||||||||||||||
| Cat & Rooster | Cat & Rooster walkin near d pool,Cat falls in the
pool,Rooster starts laughin,Moral of d story?..Wen ever theres a happy
cock theres a wet pussy! | ||||||||||||||
| Love poem | Roses are red, Pickles are green, I love your legs & whats in between! |